What I’ve learned from shirking responsbility and principles I’m setting for myself
We hate to admit it but some time in our lives, we would push our responsbilities to someone else because that’s the easier way out.
I am one who absolutely hate people who shirk their responsbility. Ironically, I was guilty of it at work last week.
I am working as a writer and editor at a small online publication and it’s my first permanent job. I’m not exactly the best writer around — I’ve probably been lucky the editor position was opened when I applied for the job.
So I was writing a piece on something about personal finance, which involved some researching on several government websites and blogs for the facts. All I had to do was to present it in a way that was a lot simpler for our readers to understand.
The hardest part wasn’t putting together the piece but the fact checking — it involved time-consuming, tedious research work. My job was to present the facts in a simple manner but fact checking is a lot more boring as compared to actually writing the piece.
So I decided to take the easy way out. I pushed that responsibility to another colleague, who was merely a translator. Because that colleague was more senior and kind enough to point out a previous mistake, I took it for granted.
A more outspoken colleague, who is also another senior, approached me and told me off. He said that it is my responsibility to our readers to make sure the facts are right, not a translator’s job.
Without realising my mistake, I went on to defend myself and said I wanted to learn from the experience of my seniors. I made a huge mistake.
Fact checking was not something I could learn from someone else’s experience. Fact checking was my responsibility and it merely required more effort on my own end. I was trying to find an easy way out for myself and I cooked up a bad and disgusting excuse.
I felt ashamed to face the colleague who I had “requested” help from and the colleague who told me off. I was ashamed to even face myself.
I thought I was being earnest and sincere in my desire to learn. I was not. I was trying to find the easy way out, I was trying to make someone accountable for my work.
Unconsciously, I was too selfish to stop to realise I was committing a serious mistake. To top it all, even when my colleague told me off, I cooked up more excuses to make myself look and feel better.
Fortunately, he was patient and kind enough to say it in a direct way and it eventually occurred to me. I’m glad I apologised and took responsibility for my actions from that point on.
This might not be a huge deal for anyone — life still goes on and I believe my colleagues understood I was still young, inexperienced and sheltered. They probably didn’t hold it against me, they might have even forgotten about it after just a few hours.
But it has been three days now and it’s still haunting me. Because I absolutely hate people who shirk responsibility and ironically, I was guilty of it.
The cherry on top of the cake is, I realised it and I’m trying to find ways to make sure I don’t commit the same mistake. It might seem like a small thing for you — who haven’t pushed responsibility away before, be it a small or huge task?
But I want to learn as much as I can and grow to become the person I want to be in the future. This is the last mistake I would ever want to commit, especially in my first permanent job.
I was lucky to have landed a decent job with a decent environment of kind colleagues. I was probably too comfortable. If I want to learn anything at all, I need to be aware of such behaviour.
I’m going to set one principle for myself to follow. I’ve learned we don’t control our lives, because principles do. This principle will govern my actions and make sure I do not try to shirk responsibility again.
I will take responsibility for everything — everything is my fault.
For some time now, for at least the recent years leading up to today, I’m increasingly trying to put the blame on myself. That way, it’d force me to depend on only myself and not think that anyone owes me anything that happens in my life.
When we take responsibility for everything we do in life, for every outcome of any situation, for every mistake that affects us, we are essentially empowering ourselves to make the changes to bring ourselves closer to the person we want to become.
We are always so fixated in pushing blame and pointing fingers when problems arise. But by taking the blame, we are giving ourselves the power to make the change, even if it is not something we should be taking the blame for at all.
I’m also going to make it a point to write more regularly about self-awareness. I’ve read multiple Medium stories to understand the importance of writing, regardless what I aspire to be.
I’ve long wanted to start writing on Medium and I’m glad I’ve finally gotten down to it. I aspire to be a writer and I believe this is one of my first few steps to achieving it.
I might never be able to make it as a writer for all I know. But I’m going to try my best.
I don’t mind being one of the millions of aspiring writers who never made it, but I won’t settle being one of the millions of aspiring writers who never even set out to try.
